My Easter Resurrection Story
It's Easter Sunday and my "believer" friends all over the world are celebrating the resurrection of their Lord and Savior, Jesus Christ. With all sincerity, I hope this is a day of peace, renewal, and celebration for each and every one of them. It was not that long ago that I was celebrating right along with them.
Rather than rushing off to church for such a celebration this morning, I've been sitting rather quietly while my family slept, sipping coffee, reading Facebook and Twitter feeds, but also contemplating the notion of resurrection and renewal. What does it (or can it) mean to those of us who no longer believe in penal substitution atonement theology, Jesus as a "God-Man", and the like? While I still spend a lot of time reading about who Jesus, the man of history probably was vs. the mythological notions so many dwell on today, church history, origin of doctrines, etc., there are still many biblical ideas that I find current and relevant from a purely human / anthropological point of view.
I've written about my recovery from religion, an ongoing process. Throughout the process, I've attempted to separate the wheat from the chaff; the good I learned from it, the harm I did in it, the poor decisions I've made because of it, and how to live a better life after it. I've gone through a grieving period where I lamented much, but I think I'm finally entering a new stage that I could call Resurrection.
Some of the things I've lamented the most have been the decisions I made throughout my life that I thought I was making based upon faith. Time after time I made some very large life decisions based upon what I thought God wanted me to do. Often they went completely against common sense. Some of these decisions cost me dearly; Lifelong dreams and career paths not taken, fortunes lost, hardship suffered, not only by me, but by my family as well. I used to write it off with a glib "Well, you don't own your beliefs until you've paid a price for them." Was it all a sacrifice to God?; I no longer believe so. For me, they have really just been a series of bad decisions that cost me and those I love dearly; decisions made during an extended state of delusion, initiated by my upbringing and further inflamed by my own nurturing. Despite my education and experience telling me that "I should have known better", I still acted foolishly and suffered consequences accordingly. That's the lamenting / suffering part. It's time to crucify the old and resurrect the new.
I've always loved the parable of the talents (http://bible.org/seriespage/parable-talents-matthew-2514-30-luke-1912-28). From a purely human perspective, I see beauty when I see people identify, nurture, and use their natural gifts and passions. Conversely, it's a shame when we see gifts squandered or at least not maximized. As a parent, I want to make sure I am cognizant of my children's gifts, dreams, and desires, and I want to make sure I do everything I can to help them achieve those dreams. As a child, I was a very good baseball player with natural talent and drive to achieve. Many of my peers went on to play in pro ball. But my parents were not in tune with the options, it was not a priority for them, and we moved away to a rural place where my skills could not be developed and baseball became a memory. I don't want that to happen to my kids.
Today is a day of renewal. I no longer see talent wasted as a sin against God, but as a human tragedy. While the ship may have sailed on many of my dreams, every day is an opportunity to dream anew and commit to its realization. In Victor Frankl's masterpiece, Man's Search for Meaning, he asserts that those best equipped to survive the most horrific of circumstances are those who found meaning beyond their circumstances; those who sought meaning rather than happiness. Today, I see the meaning of my life in a new way - in a resurrected way. There are things still to be accomplished for me personally and for my family - important, meaningful things - and I have today to start anew in achieving them. To mix metaphors, It's time to leave childish things behind. So, I'm happily burying some dreams that never will happen in the way I envisioned them. But I am resurrecting others and giving life to new dreams along with a renewed commitment toward their achievement.
Every day is an opportunity for renewal and resurrection.
Peace my friends!
Disclaimer: Relatively speaking, my life has never approximated anything remotely close to the most horrific of circumstances. Things that I lament about are mostly "First World Problems". Yes, I've experienced times of poverty and hunger, deep personal loss, and other traumas, but not the likes of which can be found every day on a global scale. A little bit of humility for all of us - We need to consider the hierarchy of needs and a global scale in such things, lest narcissism take over.
Rather than rushing off to church for such a celebration this morning, I've been sitting rather quietly while my family slept, sipping coffee, reading Facebook and Twitter feeds, but also contemplating the notion of resurrection and renewal. What does it (or can it) mean to those of us who no longer believe in penal substitution atonement theology, Jesus as a "God-Man", and the like? While I still spend a lot of time reading about who Jesus, the man of history probably was vs. the mythological notions so many dwell on today, church history, origin of doctrines, etc., there are still many biblical ideas that I find current and relevant from a purely human / anthropological point of view.
I've written about my recovery from religion, an ongoing process. Throughout the process, I've attempted to separate the wheat from the chaff; the good I learned from it, the harm I did in it, the poor decisions I've made because of it, and how to live a better life after it. I've gone through a grieving period where I lamented much, but I think I'm finally entering a new stage that I could call Resurrection.
Some of the things I've lamented the most have been the decisions I made throughout my life that I thought I was making based upon faith. Time after time I made some very large life decisions based upon what I thought God wanted me to do. Often they went completely against common sense. Some of these decisions cost me dearly; Lifelong dreams and career paths not taken, fortunes lost, hardship suffered, not only by me, but by my family as well. I used to write it off with a glib "Well, you don't own your beliefs until you've paid a price for them." Was it all a sacrifice to God?; I no longer believe so. For me, they have really just been a series of bad decisions that cost me and those I love dearly; decisions made during an extended state of delusion, initiated by my upbringing and further inflamed by my own nurturing. Despite my education and experience telling me that "I should have known better", I still acted foolishly and suffered consequences accordingly. That's the lamenting / suffering part. It's time to crucify the old and resurrect the new.
I've always loved the parable of the talents (http://bible.org/seriespage/parable-talents-matthew-2514-30-luke-1912-28). From a purely human perspective, I see beauty when I see people identify, nurture, and use their natural gifts and passions. Conversely, it's a shame when we see gifts squandered or at least not maximized. As a parent, I want to make sure I am cognizant of my children's gifts, dreams, and desires, and I want to make sure I do everything I can to help them achieve those dreams. As a child, I was a very good baseball player with natural talent and drive to achieve. Many of my peers went on to play in pro ball. But my parents were not in tune with the options, it was not a priority for them, and we moved away to a rural place where my skills could not be developed and baseball became a memory. I don't want that to happen to my kids.
Today is a day of renewal. I no longer see talent wasted as a sin against God, but as a human tragedy. While the ship may have sailed on many of my dreams, every day is an opportunity to dream anew and commit to its realization. In Victor Frankl's masterpiece, Man's Search for Meaning, he asserts that those best equipped to survive the most horrific of circumstances are those who found meaning beyond their circumstances; those who sought meaning rather than happiness. Today, I see the meaning of my life in a new way - in a resurrected way. There are things still to be accomplished for me personally and for my family - important, meaningful things - and I have today to start anew in achieving them. To mix metaphors, It's time to leave childish things behind. So, I'm happily burying some dreams that never will happen in the way I envisioned them. But I am resurrecting others and giving life to new dreams along with a renewed commitment toward their achievement.
Every day is an opportunity for renewal and resurrection.
Peace my friends!
Disclaimer: Relatively speaking, my life has never approximated anything remotely close to the most horrific of circumstances. Things that I lament about are mostly "First World Problems". Yes, I've experienced times of poverty and hunger, deep personal loss, and other traumas, but not the likes of which can be found every day on a global scale. A little bit of humility for all of us - We need to consider the hierarchy of needs and a global scale in such things, lest narcissism take over.
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